1 Preacher
2 Sharp tongues
Hot Water
Criticism
Lies
Cooking Oil

Beat preacher with sharp tongues until you kill his testimony. Once dead, preacher is ready to cook. As most preachers are too tough, put in hot water and boil until tender. Then season with criticism to taste. Coat with lies to preserve juiciness. Place in hot cooking oil and fry until done. Serve with Roasted Preacher's Wife, garnished with Stewed Preacher's Kids. Chew until all the goody is gone and spit them out.