2 c. water-ground cornmeal
1/2 c. chopped sweet onion
Dash salt
Six-pack of beer (not light beer)
Crisco

Heat Crisco to fry-point in a cast-iron Dutch oven. (This can be determined by dropping a few grains of cornmeal in the grease. If they turn brown and splatter in your face, it's hot enough). Mix the cornmeal and onion together and moisten with beer (about one cup) until the mixture can be made into golf-ball shaped mounds. Drop carefully into the hot fat. They will brown on one side and flip themselves over. Remove and drain when golden-brown.

Any criticism of the above delicacies can usually be diverted by serving the critic the remaining portion of the beer.