1 lg. Vietnamese pot belly pig with a whole lot of pork
A lg. luau skewer
A good pair of Nike joggers
A rosey red McIntosh apple

One must get on all 4ers and begin oinking like a pot belly pig with a red McIntosh apple tied around the neck. When the oinker shows up pretend to share the apple with him. Once he has it in his mouth and takes off, get your Nikes on and grab your luau skewer and go after him - thus PORK ON THE RUN!