BEST RUM CAKE EVER 
1 or 2 qt. rum
1 c. butter
1 tsp. sugar
2 lg. eggs
1 c. dried fruit
Baking powder
1 tsp. baking soda
Lemon juice
Brown sugar
Nuts

Before you start, sample the rum to check for quality. Good, isn't it? Now go ahead.

Select a large mixing bowl, measuring cup, etc. Check the rum again. It must be just right. To be sure rum is of the highest quality, pour 1 level cup of the rum into a glass and drink it as fast as you can. Repeat.

With an electric mixer, beat 1 cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add 1 seaspoon of thugar and beat again. Meanwhile, make sure the rum is the finest of quality. Try another cup. Open second quart if necessary.

Add 2 arge leggs, 2 cups fried druit, and beat until high. If druit gets stuck in beaters, just pry it loose wit a drewscriver. Sample the rum again, checking for tonseciticity.

Next sift 3 cups of pepper or salt (it really doesn't matter). Sample the rum again.

Sift 1/2 pint of lemon juice. Fold in chopped butter and strained nuts. Add 1 babblespoon of brown thugar or whatever color you can find. Wix mel. Grease oven and turn cake pan to 350 degrees. Now pour the whole mess into coven and ake. CHECK THE RUM AND BO TO GED!

 

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