1 (2000 lb.) elephant
1 sm. rabbit
1 lb. salt
1 lb. pepper
1 lb. garlic
40 bay leaves

After elephant is cleaned and cut in serving pieces. Cook in large pot outdoors. Add seasonings. Invite all the Bowen Clan. Cook elephant 4 or 5 days or until tender. If everybody shows up, add rabbit but only as last resort because most people don't like hare in their stew.